There is a lot of pressure to have the "perfect" wedding. Little girls grow up fantasizing about their wedding day. Picturing what their dress will look like, where they will have it, what kind of flowers will be in their bouquet, who their groom will be waiting for them at the end of the aisle. Wedding frenzy starts the moment you get engaged and ends the moment your reception is over. Much of engagement is spent planning for the big day. Bringing those childhood dreams to reality, that's what our culture tells us is important. There are an abundant number of TV shows ("Say Yes to the Dress" being my favorite), magazines and websites ready and willing to help make your day "perfect". As a culture we love weddings, and we want them to be perfect because it's the "best day of your life".
I agree that your wedding day is a very special day, one that you will always remember and cherish. It's the moment that two lives become one before God. A holy covenant that I can't wait to be a part of. It's the day that your life will forever be changed by and that is very exciting.
But amidst all the planning and general wedding excitement, I need a reality check. What's the outcome I want at the end of the day? A healthy, loving, God centered, long-lasting marriage is my goal. That is what we need to prepare for. Yes we're planning for the biggest celebration that we ever will plan for. But in the end, our wedding day will last just that a day.
We are doing premarriage counseling at the church we're going to. Our pastor gave us the best illustration of what marriage is like and the kind of preparation that is necessary. He said that marriage is like jumping out of a plane. You don't know exactly what is about to happen, but you do know that you're going to need something to make sure that you don't crash. That is where a parachute comes in. You put on a parachute before you jump out of a plane because you know that eventually you will need it. Premarriage counseling is like putting on that parachute before taking the big jump of marriage. Learning about what God says about marriage, learning good habits to get into, talking about things before they become issues down the road, speaking to couples that have been through the hard times and have come out on the other side. These are the things that make the parachute for marriage, so that we don't crash when things get tough. Because we all know that eventually life will get tough.
This is what God says about marriage:
"4 A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones." ~ Proverbs 12:4
" 4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’[a] 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” " ~Matthew 19:4-6
"1 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. 3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." ~ 1 Corinthians 7:1-5
"21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. " ~ Ephesians 5:21-33
I can't wait to be married. I'm so blessed that God has given me the chance to spend the rest of my life with my best friend. Our wedding will be perfect, not because everything will go exactly how we plan it, but because at the end of that day we will be man and wife.
88 days to go!
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
~ 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Monday, January 31, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Work vs School
Working full-time is NOT like school. With school you can make all of your classes in the afternoon so that everyday is like the weekend and you can sleep in. Work however is not like that. You must get up early every morning during the week and fight traffic to get to your job.
School has lots of breaks and time off. There is no winter or summer break with work. Even when schools are closed for a snow day, you must still work because the roads are never bad enough to make it so you can't work from home.
The good thing about work is that as long as you are low enough on the totem at work, once you leave work, work is done. School is not like that; once you leave school , homework must be done. It looms over your head like a dark cloud that goes with you every where you go. Putting a damper on all of the fun that you are trying to have while procrastinating on your school work. With work, there is no cloud. Just sunny skies when you're not working.
I'm a creature of habit and with school you must change your routine every few months.
In my opinion work wins for the last two reasons.
School has lots of breaks and time off. There is no winter or summer break with work. Even when schools are closed for a snow day, you must still work because the roads are never bad enough to make it so you can't work from home.
The good thing about work is that as long as you are low enough on the totem at work, once you leave work, work is done. School is not like that; once you leave school , homework must be done. It looms over your head like a dark cloud that goes with you every where you go. Putting a damper on all of the fun that you are trying to have while procrastinating on your school work. With work, there is no cloud. Just sunny skies when you're not working.
I'm a creature of habit and with school you must change your routine every few months.
In my opinion work wins for the last two reasons.
Engaged!!!!!!!!!
I know this post is very late, but better late than never right?
I had been praying for a long time that when Sean and I did get engaged I would be surprised and not any weird unrealistic expectations. God totally had my back. Sean couldn't have done a better job! I was so surprised and the way he purposed was more amazing than anything I could have ever come up with.
What I thought was going to be a great birthday present turned out to be a weekend that changed my life. Sean and I had talked about rent a couple of hotel rooms in VA beach ever since the summer, but I thought it was one of those pipe dreams that would never come true. Sean had other plans and rented us two rooms at the Holiday Inn on the ocean for what I thought was going to be just a birthday present. (On a side note, Sean has been one-upping himself each time he gives me a present, so next time my b-day rolls around we may have to go to the moon to surpass this birthday) We met at the hotel and Sean had already checked us in. The room was amazing, I even had a balcony! Sean suggested that we go for a walk along the beach before we went to dinner. As we were walking the sun was setting and the ocean was reflecting all of the beautiful colors in the sky. At some point we stopped walking and Sean got down on one knee and asked if I would marry him. I was in total shock! It was the most perfect moment ever!
Ever since then, it has kind of been surreal. I can't believe that we are going to be married. God has blessed us so much and I'm so thankful that He put Sean in my life. I can't wait to see what God has in store for our future. If it's anything like the past couple of years, I know it will be awesome!
I had been praying for a long time that when Sean and I did get engaged I would be surprised and not any weird unrealistic expectations. God totally had my back. Sean couldn't have done a better job! I was so surprised and the way he purposed was more amazing than anything I could have ever come up with.
What I thought was going to be a great birthday present turned out to be a weekend that changed my life. Sean and I had talked about rent a couple of hotel rooms in VA beach ever since the summer, but I thought it was one of those pipe dreams that would never come true. Sean had other plans and rented us two rooms at the Holiday Inn on the ocean for what I thought was going to be just a birthday present. (On a side note, Sean has been one-upping himself each time he gives me a present, so next time my b-day rolls around we may have to go to the moon to surpass this birthday) We met at the hotel and Sean had already checked us in. The room was amazing, I even had a balcony! Sean suggested that we go for a walk along the beach before we went to dinner. As we were walking the sun was setting and the ocean was reflecting all of the beautiful colors in the sky. At some point we stopped walking and Sean got down on one knee and asked if I would marry him. I was in total shock! It was the most perfect moment ever!
Ever since then, it has kind of been surreal. I can't believe that we are going to be married. God has blessed us so much and I'm so thankful that He put Sean in my life. I can't wait to see what God has in store for our future. If it's anything like the past couple of years, I know it will be awesome!
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